Some people can travel light. They may be leaving for a six month trip to the wilds of the Amazon rain forest, or to the outer reaches of Mars and all they need to pack are a change of underwear and an English to Martian Dictionary. (The dictionary comes in handy in the rain forest if you feel the urge to bean a wandering toaster. And on Mars the rocks speak nothing but Martian. Very provincial and very, very uncultured.
But, it’s Mars. You really can’t expect the local geo-fauna to be very communicative. It’s the red planet for a reason. The reason being that red is the least talkative of the colors…
…yeah, I’m so fucking out of ideas.)
I am not one of them. I travel heavy. Really, really heavy. I over pack so badly that some people may get the impression that I believe that my sole hope of salvation depends on me stuffing as many things as I can into my backpack. For instance, this last weekend, for an overnight trip to
I hadn’t packed any shoes, but I had the sock front fully covered. If there came a time for me to do my duty, and if that duty involved me having four pairs of socks, perhaps using those socks to fight off rampaging hordes of sock-less monstrosities, I would not be found wanting.
While packing my bag all this seemed perfectly reasonable. I needed backups in case I dropped water or coffee or alcohol over any of my clothes. And then those backups needed backups which needed backups that needed backups…unto infinty.
Eventually I only ended up needing one T-shirt.
...And I forgot my tooth brush.
3 comments:
Brilliant. I like the climax!
I,too, am a disciple of the Lord of Overpacking. I went on a trip last week, I packed 3 jeans, 5 tshirts, 4 pairs of socks, undershirts - to cover the many ways in which my clothes might get dirty, wet, sweaty........but i forgot my comb.
I then had to use what Homo Sapien Neanderthal used for combing their dreadlocks - my fingers.
"...loud explosions and lots of semi-naked women have now made an appearance in this post."
With all that talk of over-packing and descriptions of socks and pantyhose, I thought the entire post was about the explosion of overstuffed backpacks and semi-naked women (note: the use of one t-shirt was mentioned. However, no pants nor skirts were found to be necessary) who don't brush their teeth.
Did I miss something?
a) Fingers make the best combs.
b) Semi-naked women exploding from backpacks? In pantyhose?
I like the way you think.
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